Tuesday, August 31, 2010

The Letter of Reference


The Letter of Reference

To Whom It May Concern:
Bob Smith, my assistant programmer, can always be found
  hard at work in his cubicle. Bob works independently, without
  wasting company time talking to colleagues. Bob never
  thinks twice about assisting fellow employees, and he always
  finishes given assignments on time. Often he takes extended
  measures to complete his work, sometimes skipping coffee
  breaks. Bob is a dedicated individual who has absolutely no
  vanity, in spite of his high accomplishments and profound
  knowledge in his field. I firmly believe that Bob can be
  classed as a high-caliber employee, the type which cannot be
  dispensed with. Consequently, I duly recommend that Bob be
  promoted to executive management, and a proposal will be
  executed as soon as possible.
Delivered a short time later:
"That idiot was standing over my shoulder while I wrote the letter sent to you earlier today. Kindly re-read only every other line."

Vocabulary Help

  • always - sempre
  • find (find, found, found) - encontrado
  • fellow employees - companheiros de trabalho
  • assignments - tarefas
  • skip coffee breaks - não usar os intervalos de café
  • vanity - vaidade
  • in spite of - apesar de
  • accomplishments - realizações
  • shoulder - ombro
  • every other line - ler pulando uma linha

Sunday, August 29, 2010

Sad Stories

Sad Stories

Bill, Jim & Scott were at a convention together & were sharing a large suite on the top of a 75-story skyscraper.
After a long day of meetings, they were shocked to hear that the elevators in their hotel were broken & they would have to climb 75 flights of stairs to get to their room.
Bill said to Jim & Scott,"Let's break the monotony of this unpleasant task by concentrating on something interesting. I'll tell jokes for 25 flights, Jim can sing songs for the next 25 flights and Scott can tell sad stories for the rest of the way."
At the 26th floor, Bill stopped telling jokes & Jim began to sing. At the 51st floor Jim stopped singing & Scott began to tell sad stories.
"I will tell my saddest story first," he said."I left the room key in the car!!!

Vocabulary Help

  • sad - triste
  • sharing - dividindo
  • skyscraper - arranha-céu
  • meetings - reuniões, encontros
  • climb - subir a pé
  • flights of stairs - escadas
  • task - tarefa

Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Rooster Race


Rooster Race

An old rooster sees a young one strutting around and he gets a little worried. So, they're trying to replace me, thinks the old rooster. I've got to do something about this. He walks up to the new bird and says, "So, you're the new guy in town. I bet you really think you're hot stuff don't you? I'm not exactly ready for the chopping block yet. I bet I'm still the better bird. And to prove it, I challenge you to a race around that hen house over there. We'll run around it ten times and whoever finish's first gets to have all the hens for himself."
Well, the young rooster was a proud sort, and he definitely thought he was more than a match for the old guy. You're on," said the young rooster. "And since I know I'm so great, I'll even give you a head start of half a lap."
"I'll still win easily," said the young cocky rooster.
So, the two roosters go over to the hen house to start the race and all the hens gather around to watch. The race begins and all the hens start cheering the roosters on.
After the first lap, the old rooster is still maintaining his lead. After the second lap, the old guys lead has slipped a little but he's still hanging in there. Unfortunately the old roosters lead continued to slip each time around, and by the fifth lap he just barely led the young rooster. By then, the farmer has heard all the commotion. He ran into the house, got his shotgun, and ran out to the barn yard, figuring a fox or something was after his chickens. When he got there, he saw the two roosters running around the hen house, with the old rooster still slightly in the lead. He immediately took his shotgun, aimed, fired, and blew the young rooster away. He walked away slowly, saying to himself.........
"That's the third gay rooster I've bought this month."

Vocabulary Help

  • rooster - galo
  • strut - andar orgulhosamente
  • worry - preocupação
  • new guy - cara novo
  • town - cidade
  • bet - apostar
  • chopping block - matadouro
  • challenge - desafio
  • race - corrida
  • hen house - galinheiro
  • proud sort - tipo orgulhoso
  • head start - vantagem
  • half a lap - meia volta
  • maintain - manter
  • shotgun - espingarda
  • barn yard - pátio do celeiro
  • figure - imaginar
  • fox - raposa

Sunday, August 22, 2010

Minhas listas - ...em pleno crescimento

PALAVRAS IDÊNTICAS OU MUITO PARECIDAS

O QUE VOCÊ NÃO SABE QUE SABE EM INGLÊS

PROVÉRBIOS EM INGLÊS

PALAVRAS COM A MESMA PRONÚNCIA, PORÉM COM ESCRITA DIFERENTE

FALSOS COGNATOS OU FALSE FRIENDS

Se você lembrar de outras palavras e quiser contribuir envie um e-mail para marcusaugusto.vale@gmail.com

College Test

College Test

During my second month of college, our professor gave us a test.
I was a conscientious student and had breezed through the questions, until I read the last one: What is the first name of the woman who cleans the school?
Surely this was some kind of joke. I had seen the cleaning woman several times. She was tall, dark-haired and in her 50s, but how would I know her name?
I handed in my paper, leaving the last question blank. Just before class ended, one student asked if the last question would count toward our quiz grade.
Absolutely, said the professor. In your careers, you will meet many people. All are significant. They deserve your attention and care, even if all you do is smile and say hello.
I've never forgotten that lesson. I also learned her name was Dorothy.

Vocabulary Help

  • breeze through - passar os olhos rapidamente
  • joke - piada, gozação
  • tall - alta
  • dark-haired - morena
  • hand in the paper - entregar o teste
  • blank - em branco
  • quiz - prova, teste
  • career - carreira
  • meet (meet, met, met) - encontrar
  • deserve - merecer
  • care - cuidado, atenção
  • smile - sorrir
  • forget (forget, forgot, forgotten) - esquecer
  • learn (learn, learnt, learnt) - aprender

Road painting

Road painting

One day this blonde got hired for a job, painting lines on the road.
The first day on the job she painted 20 miles of lines, the second day she painted only 15 miles, the next day 10 miles and then the next only 5 miles.
That day her boss asked her "How can you do 20 miles of lines one day then 3 days later only do 5 miles of lines?"
"It's one long walk back to that paint can!" she replies.

Vocabulary Help

  • road - estrada
  • boss - chefe
  • long walk - longa caminhada
  • paint can - lata de tinta

Saturday, August 21, 2010

Perfect People

Perfect People

Practically perfect people never permit sentiment to muddle their thinking.
Mary Poppins

Vocabulary Help

  • muddle - confundir, atrapalhar

Rights

Rights

Men have as exaggerated an idea of their rights as women have of their wrongs.
E.W. Howe

Vocabulary Help

  • rights - direitos
  • women - mulheres
  • wrongs - erros

Thursday, August 19, 2010

Strange but Interesting Facts


Strange but Interesting Facts (3)

  • China has more English speakers than the United States.
  • The electric chair was invented by a dentist.
  • "I am" is the shortest complete sentence in the English language.
  • Cats have over 100 vocal sounds, dogs only have about 10.
  • Our eyes are always the same size from birth, but our noses and ears never stop growing.
  • Many hamsters only blink one eye at a time.
  • In every episode of Seinfeld there is a Superman somewhere.
  • Feb 1865 is the only month in recorded history not to have a full moon.
  • Montpelier, Vermont is the only U.S. State capital without a McDonald's.
    ==Vocabulary Help==
  • at a time - de cada vez
  • blink - piscar
  • cat - gato
  • dog - cão
  • ear - ouvido
  • electric chair - cadeira elétrica
  • eye - olho
  • full moon - lua cheia
  • grow (grow, grew, grown) - crescer
  • nose - nariz
  • sound - som

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Relativity

Relativity

When a man sits with a pretty girl for an hour, it seems like a minute. But let him sit on a hot stove for a minute and it's longer than any hour. That's relativity.
Einstein

Vocabulary Help

  • sit (sit, sat, sat) - sentar
  • pretty girl - garota bonita
  • seems like - parece
  • hot stove - fogão quente

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Florist Mistake

Florist Mistake

On opening his new store, a man received a bouquet of flowers. He became dismayed on reading the enclosed card, that it expressed "Deepest Sympathy". While puzzling over the message, his telephone rang. It was the florist, apologizing for having sent the wrong card.
"Oh, it's alright." said the storekeeper. "I'm a businessman and I understand how these things can happen."
"But," added the florist, "I accidentally sent your card to a funeral party."
"Well, what did it say?" ask the storekeeper.
"'Congratulations on your new location'." was the reply.

Vocabulary Help

  • apologize - desculpar
  • businessman - homem de negócios
  • deepest - profunda
  • dismayed - triste, desconsolado
  • open - abrir
  • puzzle over - quebrar a cabeça, pensar
  • receive - receber
  • reply - resposta
  • ring (ring, rang, rung) - tocar
  • store - loja
  • wrong - errado

More Thoughts on Marriage

More Thoughts on Marriage

Getting married is very much like going to a continental restaurant with friends. You order what you want, then when you see what the other person has, you wish you had ordered that.

At the cocktail party, one woman said to another
-- Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?
The other replied:
-- Yes I am -- I married the wrong man.

When a man opens the car door for his wife, you can be sure of one thing: either the car is new or the wife.

Vocabulary Help

  • wish - desejar
  • order - pedir
  • wear - usar
  • wedding ring - anel de casamento
  • wrong - errado
  • finger - dedo
  • wife - esposa